Sunday, September 6, 2015

Parenting Fails *Facepalm*

Well, so we're all sick over here. All three of us have this dang pesty cold. Pretty sure I got it first, and then, like any loving wife and mother would do, I passed it off to my husband and son.


Anyway, to keep my spirits up, I'm going to write about all the things we've done hilariously wrong in the past (almost) four months as parents. There's a lot of opportunity for FAIL when navigating parenthood for the first time, so it's a good thing A.) We can laugh it off most of the time and B.) John Paul will never remember all these fails.


Let's start here, shall we? . . .

So, there was this one time John was carrying John Paul around right after a feeding, without the all-important burp cloth to protect his shoulder. That day we learned the hard way, ALWAYS carry a burp cloth.

We also learned pretty quickly that diapers are ineffective if we don't point his pee-producing part down and/or we don't check the tightness of the leg holes. Both result in one of two types of warm liquid being spilled over all the things, including blankets, pants, the couch, the boppy . . . basically whatever the baby is sitting on. Let's just say we've done a LOT of extra laundry since John Paul was born. It's a steep learning curve, folks.

Then there was this other time my son gave himself a hickey. I was carrying him in our Boba Wrap and he was soothing himself by sucking on his arm. I thought it was pretty harmless and also super cute, until later, when I discovered he had a massive bruise-like hickey on his arm. I was horrified. Good thing hickey bruises heal up fast.

Oh, and we also spent the first 6 weeks of his life not realizing we had to help him take naps during the day. We were wondering why he was SO fussy and needy all the time. Take note: if a baby is yawning and fussing at you, he's probably tired, and he probably needs your help falling asleep. Got it.

Also, if you're like us and you're too cheap to buy a changing table, you will likely have to be ok with getting poop on whatever surface you're changing baby on.

Exhibit A
Our bed, with poop on it:

We've also learned that people will judge you when you let your newborn have an iPhone. In our defense, it's an old iPhone that's permanently on airplane mode, solely used as a sound machine to soothe our sleepy baby. But mostly it just looks like 4-month old has a cell phone.

And most recently, we've been that couple who brings their baby out to bars/restaurants when we should be home letting him nap instead. At least it makes for some cute pictures!

Alright, that's enough fail for one post. I'm sure we'll have more to share as time goes on. Because it's basically impossible to get parenting 100% right, especially this first go-around. But at least it's (mostly) fun in the process!

I'll leave you with some recent pics of our little man, to balance all that FAIL with some CUTE.


  1. I love that you can laugh about all of this! I recently looked through notes on my phone about Monica's first month and was reminded about our own parenting fails.

    Something I learned the hard way fast was if I was going to watch a diaper change, I should be standing near her head, not her bottom. When she was less than a week old, I witnessed an impressive display of projectile poop: it landed on both changing pad covers, on the floor, and on my robe maybe a foot or two away! And no, John wasn't hit with poop at all!

    1. Hahaha! Oh man, projectile poop. I didn't want to believe it was a thing. But then it happened to us. And now I believe. I also ALWAYS have the new diaper super close by to catch projectile poops now. Works 90% of the time because he usually gives us a good TOOT as a warning. The other 10% of the time though. Ugh. SO GROSS. I hope John was *eventually* hit by poop. :P

  2. Hehehe what a cutie!!! I'm still experiencing parenting fails in a daily basis 😉

  3. What a cutie! And hilarious poo accident. :) Oh, and we had one of those rosaries too...until a curious puppy decided to do some praying with his teeth and accidentally ate the entire thing. Oops. We could do an entire post on baby/dog fails!

    1. Hahaha, I wonder which puppy that could be? :P

      Do I smell a baby/dog fails link-up in our future?! Jk, jk. :)

  4. In the grand scheme of things, none of those "FAILS" sound really all that bad. I hope that means things are generally going well! I love the cute pictures.

    1. Ha! You're right. Very mild fails in the grand scheme of things. We still have our ups and downs, but for the most part, we're happy. :)


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